A fault in my Lifeline
by Tinyss
Summary: After a trauma, Lucy is suffering a lot. Where are friends when you need them the most? One-shot rated T due to heavy emotions.


Lu-chan?" Levy said as she turned around. "Leaving already?" The celestial spirit Mage turned to her best friend and smiled. "I'm not feeling well, so I'm going to bed early today." Levy nodded understandingly at her as she dodged a chair flying past her. "Take care of yourself, lu!" Lucy walked out of the guild as she waved at levy. "I will!"

She loved her guild mates to death, but they could be rather exhausting from time to time. "Those morons are gonna kill me some day..." She giggled and shook her head. Hearing a loud popping noise, she looked at the path in front of her. "The streetlacrima died again..." She sighed. She straightened her back. "I'm not afraid of the dark... Come on, Lucy.. Nothing to be afraid of..." She made her way forward when she suddenly heard footsteps behind her. "Lucy, huh?" She felt a warm breath in her neck, and screeched as she jumped back. In front of her was a muscled man, a stench of alcohol lingering around him. He stepped towards her, startling Lucy, and he trapped her wrists between his strong hands. "Well Lucy, you're gonna have the time of your life tonight." Lucy tried to free herself as she screamed for help. "Leave me alone, you pervert!" He started pulling her towards a small alley, hiding in the darkest spot of the street. Lucy wanted to scream again, but the man had his hand covering her mouth. Tears filled her eyes as the seriousness of the situation finally got to her. She had her keys so close, yet she couldn't touch them. 'Loke...' She thought. 'Please...' But he never came.

It had been 4 months since then. She had been raped, and then left alone in the alley. " lucky Lucy my ass..." She snickered. She was wearing only her bra and underpants, since her normal clothes had become to big soon after the 'incident', and there was no way that she would go shopping for clothes. She was ugly and fat. Wasn't this what happy and natsu where always saying too? That she is too heavy, chubby? She had lost some weight, and she didn't look like a whale anymore, but even now, in front of the mirror, she could see her fat overlapping her underwear, and she clearly had a belly. "Guess I'll won't eat today again... Not that it's bad, I don't like going out, so if I eat less, I have to go out less for food." She looked in the mirror, and felt how her eyes started to get watery as she realized how ugly she is. She sat down on the ground and started crying. Suddenly, a long-forgotten golden light appeared and before Lucy realized who it was, Loke stood in front of her. He didn't see her as first, and looked around him. "Lucy, I know you're here." He sighed. " you haven't called any of us in months, what's wrong?" She let out a deep breath and Loke turned around.

He saw his favorite Mage sitting on the ground in nothing but her underwear. At first, he blushed and wanted to avert his eyes, knowing how mad Lucy would be, but then her condition became clear to him. She was deadly pale, her bones were only hidden by her skin, and to loke's shock, she was covered in scars and cuts. "Lu-Lucy.." he stuttered. He bowed next to her and took her in his arms. "What happened?" Suddenly, Lucy started screaming and started struggling in loke's arms. "Lucy?" He said with a flustered face. "Leave me alone, pervert!" He quickly let go of her and back of. "Lucy, please tell me what happened to you." She lifted her head up and looked to him with an utterly anxious expression. Then it turned in anger. "Lucy?" He stepped closer. "Go away!" She yelled. "Look, I'm only trying to help-" "Go. Away." Loke flinched. "I hate you. I never want to see you again, Loke." He didn't believe her. Why would she say this? "Loke, I hereby break the contract. Never show your face here again."

No way... This wasn't happening... For the first time in his life, Loke didn't know what to do or say. "Lucy..? You're kidding, right?" he looked at her with a hurt expression. "Go!" It made Loke stumble back and he fell over a pile of clothes. He stood up and started to fade out. A tear ran over his cheek, and then he disappeared. "Goodbye..." Lucy whispered. "I'm so sorry, I just don't wanna hurt anyone anymore..." She curled up and started bawling. "I'm so sorry... Everyone..."

It was afternoon when Loke showed up. Most were all ready gone, but Mira, team natsu, gajeel and levy were still hanging out at the guildhall. Levy was the first to notice the lion spirit. "Loke? long time no see! How is Lucy's training going?" She stopped smiling as she saw his fists clench. "Loke? Are you alright?" "Training..?" He whispered. "I see.. So that's why..." The others were now looking at Loke. Natsu jumped up and spurted towards the spirit. He grabbed his shirt and pulled him towards him. "Oi, you womanizer, did something happen to Lucy?" Loke pushed natsu away. He looked up to the others. "Why did no one check on her?! Isn't it weird that Lucy, who loves everyone here to death, who's a huge scaredy cat, goes out, on her OWN, to train for months?!" It was dead silent in the hall. Levy started stuttering. "L-Loke, what do you mean?" He looked at the girl with such an intense stare that gajeel stepped between the two and growled at Loke. The lion spirit shook his head and started laughing with his face in his hand. "Loke?" Erza said. He stopped laughing and uncovered his face. To the shock of all of them, tears were streaming down his face. Gray stepped towards him and offered a chair. " hé man, just sit down and tell us what's wrong. He obeyed the ice mage, and sat down with a deep sigh. "She never went on training..." He said, causing the mages to look at each other worriedly. "I- I don't know what happened. She hasn't called any of us in months, so I went to check on her an hour ago. I found her in her bedroom. Her room was a mess, and so was she. She looked as if she hadn't slept or ate in days, and she was covered in scars... Not only that, she acted really strange and..." He stopped and stared at his hands. "Loke?" Erza said. "What happened?" He gritted his teeth. "When I walked up to her, she started screaming and said she hated me... Then, she broke our contract and said she never wanted to see me again..." The mages standing around him were shocked, and Mira, who was still washing plates, dropped one and it scattered in a thousand pieces. Loke looked up at them with a desperate expression. "I'm supposed to be returning to the spirit world now, but this just isn't right... In the time I can stay here on my own power, I want to help Lucy... So please come with me so we can try to find out what happened..." Everyone was silent. Then, levy pumped her fist in the air, and yelled:"let's help lu-chan!" Soon, the others started yelling with her. Loke smiled through his tears at the sight. "You guys..." He whispered.

"Lucy, open up!" Natsu yelled as he banged her front door. It was already dark when the mages arrived at her home. "I can't hear anyone inside..." Natsu said. They turned around to gajeel and he shook his head. "Bunny girl ain't here." Natsu lost his temper and bashed into her apartment. "Natsu!" Erza yelled. "Stop wrecking Lucy's stuff!" He ignored the red head and stormed up the stairs, the others following him close. When they arrived there, the room was exactely how Loke described it, except for Lucy not being there. They started to search the room and soon, Mira called the others with a trembling voice. "Guys, you have to see this..." When the others got to Mira, they saw her standing in the kitchen with a knife in her hand, dried-up blood covering the knife and a part of the kitchen. "Lucy's blood..." Natsu stuttered. "She was cutting herself..?" Erza whispered.

A scream came from the other side of the apartment, followed by loud noises of something hitting the ground. "Levy!" Gajeel yelled. He ran towards Lucy's bedroom, and saw levy sitting on the ground, bawling her eyes out, clutching something to her chest. "Levy, what's wrong?" He grabbed her schouders and she turned her head to him. He looked straight into her watery eyes. She started crying again and threw herself in his arms. Gajeel started blushing madly but tried to comfort her. "Stop crying, bookworm." He said. "What you got there in your hands?" She handed it over to him, and after a few tense moments, his face darkened and he handed the paper over to Mira. Mira gasped and shook her head, were after Loke pulled it out of her hands and read it with the others. It said:

Dear Fairy Tail,

I want to thank you for all your kindness. Four months ago, when I was going home in the middle of the night, I got attacked and raped. After that, I realized it was because I look like a slut, so it was all my fault. I tried to change, but it didn't work out. Even losing weight didn't work, since I was still fat even though I really tried to lose weight. I hate myself, and I don't deserve being alive. Therefore, I'm going to end it. I know you were only my 'friends' because you pitied me, but you won't have to do that anymore. I won't be a burden to you any longer.

Levy, I want you to continue on my book, so my life had some purpose after all. That's all I wanted to say.

Farewell.

Yours sincerely,

Lucy Heartfilia

Erza was the first to react. "That Lucy had to deal with that all on her own... Can we even call us selves her friends? " She looked up to the others. "It may not be to late. Considering that she didn't.." She gulped. "...hang herself here or cut her wrists, she will be likely to jump off a high building or jump in front of the train, so we may still have time to find her." Gajeel got levy up, and they looked at each other as they stood around in a circle. "We'll split up. No time to waste, so everyone goes of on their own. Let's save Lucy!" Erza yelled. "Let's save Lucy!" The others started yelling. And of they went.

They were searching for about an hour. They had searched all the high places in magnolia and the trainstation, but it was almost as if Lucy had vanished. Loke was wandering around, frantically summing up what options were left. Then, he stopped. He smacked himself on his forehead and cursed. That he didn't think about it earlier! A high place, where she would spent her last moments.. It had to be a place that was dear to her.. And surprise, the new Fairytail building was almost as high as the highest building in magnolia! That had to be it!

Loke panted as he was running up the stairs to the roof of the guild as fast as he could. He was almost there...just a few more steps... and there she was, his princess. Her golden hair wavered around her like a halo, as she stood on the edge of the roof, watching the sleeping magnolia. He crept towards her, softly, stealthily, like the predator he is. Only a few more meters... " gotcha!" He yelled. He grabbed her by her waist and let himself fall on his back, the girl tightly wrapped into his arms. "Let me go, Loke!" She cried. "I have to do this!" He tightened his grip, making her gasp. "Never, Lucy. I won't let you go." Her struggling got weaker and weaker, until she stopped and gave in to Loke. She cried. "Just let me end it. I don't want to suffer any longer." She whimpered. Loke felt a sting in his heart, but he had to keep his guard up. At this moment, he couldn't stand up without Lucy escaping his arms, but if he kept this on long enough either she would fall asleep, or someone came to his aid. Suddenly, she made herself limp, and she stopped breathing. "Lucy?" He lowered his guard, thinking the girl had collapsed from fatigue and famish, but she tricked him. She jumped straight up and made her way to the edge. Just before she went over it, she made a spin, and faced Loke. Everything went in slow motion, as if time itself had stopped. "I'm sorry" she said. And she went over the edge. No! He screamed. He dashed after her and... He jumped. He was much heavier, and it didn't take long before she was in his reach. He wrapped her in his arms, and prepared himself for the impact. The ground came closer and closer... but when they were supposed to hit the ground, a pink wooly cloud caught them. "Im sorry!" A soft, girly voice said. "But you are not the only one who's there for master, loke..." Loke wanted to scream out of happiness. "Aries!" The girl smiled at him. "I'm sorry, but I can't stay here any longer on my own.. Bye!" And she disappeared, just like the cloud.

And there they sat. Loke with Lucy tightly in his arms, in front of the guild. "Lucy, how could you do this?" He whispered as he stroke her cheek. "You're the most beautiful girl there is. You're talented, loved even by foes! You're sexy, and there wasn't a single moment you were even CLOSE to being fat. I love you Lucy, even thought you broke our contract, I'm always there for you." She looked up at him, tears streaming down her face. "Then where were you when I was raped by that drunk pervert?!" She said. "Where were you when I started doing self-harm, when I got suicidal. Four whole months, you weren't there!" He pulled her closer, hid his face in her hair and pulled her further on his lap, holding her like a baby. "For that," he said in her hair, "I don't have an excuse. I should have been there, and it's a sin I'll bare for as long as I live, which is long." He said as he petted her. She said nothing for a while, but when she started talking again, her voice sounded more alike the old Lucy's voice. As if someone had lit her light again. "Loke, I'm sorry for being so selfish. I promise I'll seek help as soon as I can." She nuzzled her head on his chest. "I have just one request.." His heart began pounding faster. "What is it, princess?" He whispered. "I want you to stay at my side for as long as I live..." She said. His heart made a jump out of happiness, and he hugged the girl in his arms. "I will!" He blurted out. "I'm not proposing to you, you know?" She laughed. He was so glad he could hear her laughing again. " I know..." He started crying. "Loke? Oh gosh, stop crying! It doesn't fit you at all." She said weakily. "I'm just so glad that you're still alive..." He sighed. She yawned. "Is it alright if I just go to sleep in your arms? I'm so tired..." He nodded. "Sure, my princess." And she had dozed of already. He pulled her closer and planted a kiss on her forehead. He had saved his princess... It was all he could ever wish for.

"Loke? Is that...?" The others came running towards him. It was already sunrise. "We were too late..." Gray said as he stared as the pale and limp girl clenched in loke's arms, tears streaming down the spirit's face. Levy started crying, mira following, and natsu, gray and erza tried their best to hold it in and not bawl their eyes out at the death of their teammate. Even gajeel had to sweep a tear from the corner of his eye. "We were so damn close..." He swore. Loke turned around, and realized their situation. "No, no she's still alive!" He said. The others looked at him in shock. "Then why is she limp?" Natsu asked. "She's sleeping." Loke said. "She was really tired." The ambiance got less tense. "And why are you crying?" Gray said. Loke quickly wept his tears away. "I'm just happy that she's all right..." He said. "Plus, I'm not crying. That's just some dust in my eye." The group started laughing. "Yeah, sure mister womanizer." Gray grinned. Loke started laughing with them. It was a happily ever after.

In the following months, Lucy had gone into therapy and conquered anorexia, her depression, and her trauma. She didn't have to do it alone, since all her friends were supporting her throughly. The man who had raped her got caught by the magic council, and got sentenced with life-long prison after he was charged with several harassments on women. This story had an happy end, but in real life, it doesn't always end well. In a lot of cases, the people surrounding the person suffering a trauma, a lesion, or a depression will notice when it's already to late for the person to be saved. What's even more sad, is that a lot of people will only notice the person is acting weird, de-friending the person. This way, the person has to go through all of it alone. A friend of mine went through the same, excluding the rape, but with an other trauma clouding her mind. She would've jumped in front of a train if we hadn't found out, and all went there, stopping her as if we were there coincidentally. We told her what a great person she is, and how much we all love her, without bringing up her condition. If we did, it would make her feel even worse, thinking that we would only pity her. She went into rehab and she is still in recovery. I wish all this cases would go like this, but sadly enough, they don't. If you ever notice someone in your surrounding acting weird, angry, sad, mean, please don't avoid this person. Discover what's wrong, cuz no one is always grumpy due to nature. So promise me that if you have a person like this in your surrounding, get to know him/her. Make them talk. Let them know you're there. This can prevent something this tragic to happen.

Thanks for your attention,

Xxx Tinyss


End file.
